Four steps toward positive change
I have spent the better part of the last four years thinking about the patterns in human interaction. How do they show up in the stories we tell? What kinds of patterns repeat in small ways and in big ones? How do we become aware of unfolding patterns and use that strategically?
Thinking about these kinds of questions can help us function better as individuals, as organizations, and may even make the world at large a better place. The idea is simple. To really know a person, an organization, or even a community we look for repeated behaviors. We sometimes watch what a person does for a while before trusting him completely. Why do we do this? Sometimes it is because we want to decide how close to get to someone, whether to collaborate or compete, or to judge trustworthiness, among other things. We look for clues to the underlying principles that tell us who a person is, what kind of organization we are dealing with, or what a particular community is like.
These are the simple rules that generate self-similar aggregate behaviors. Uh oh! There goes the technobabble again! In simpler terms, we want to know what makes the people, organizations, and societies we deal with tick. What’s behind those repeated behaviors? Perhaps if we can understand the principles, values, and beliefs behind an organization’s or person’s behaviors we can make better decisions about how to deal with them.
Those of us engaged in personal development and self-improvement work also look for our own patterns in an effort to replace bad habits with good ones. Chicken fried steak becomes salad; overscheduling is replaced by selectively accepting engagements; company procedures are documented and revised… The list goes on. To that end, I offer you four basic ideas that I believe can help transform the way we live and work.
1) Relational introspection: This is my term for paying attention to the environment, other people, and yourself all at the same time. It can be done at an individual level or at a group level as you think about how your organization interacts with other organizations.
Here’s how. Try to tune in to yourself, others, and your surroundings all at the same time. When you enter into any business or personal engagement, it is important to understand your own motives, desires, and emotional state- self. At the same time, pay attention to the other person’s agenda, needs, motives, etc. – others. Now consider your role, your partner’s role, and your combined intentions in context- ecosystem. To use a silly metaphor, think of yourself as a fish in an aquarium. Strive to know and understand your own fins and preferred direction, those of the other fish you school with, and the water you all swim in. I call this relational introspection because when we cultivate this kind of awareness, we are learning to look inward and outward at the same time, seeing ourselves and our relationships in context (Wakefield, 2012).
2) Spotting patterns: Once you learn to observe individual and group interactions using relational introspection, the next step is to look for patterns. Just like the patterns we see in nature, there are patterns in human interaction that repeat in small ways and in big ways. These kinds of patterns are likely to crop up again and again, although the exact timing, scope, and details are tough to predict.
Once you see something occurring over and over, on small scales and large scales, you may be on to something. How likely is it that the pattern you see will repeat? If it does, what does that mean for you, your business, and the larger community? Is this a pattern you want to pay attention to in the future?
3) Making choices: I believe that in each moment of choice, we combine our old patterns and habits with the influences of new information (e.g. influence from leaders, what we have read, etc.) and ultimately choose to do something like what we would normally do or to try something different (Wakefield, 2012). The point is to step beyond our old fashioned lists of pros and cons, weighted decision matrices, etc. and think in terms of processes and patterns. Do we do what we normally would (same pattern) or is a different action appropriate? If we understand the kinds of patterns that characterize our own behaviors, those of our competitors or collaborators, and our community, what does that do to the quality of our decision-making?
4) Habits: There are many approaches to making changes last, whether on an individual level or in groups, but most people would agree that real, transformational change is hard. Aristotle is credited with the notion of ethics tied to habits. Our habits in some ways make us who we are. At the same time, we choose our habits, often consciously. You may need a daily checklist, a poster above your desk, a reminder written on your calendar, or to commit to a class or regular meeting with your business coach... The point is to not let our choices amount to fleeting whims. That is not to say that every decision becomes a dogmatic thing that we blindly commit to. Some choices turn out to be bad ones, requiring us to return to our old habits or try something else.
For many people, this last step is where yoga comes into play. When we do a regular vinyasa practice, there are certain sequences of moves that repeat in many kinds of practice. These “flows” are a concrete example of how we can choose to shape patterns of behavior and create generative habits. There are myriad self-help methods, processes, and organization development tools designed to help make positive changes last. This is just one example.
I just gave you a lot of information in a very short post! Are you ready to try it or at least think about it? What happens when you pay attention to the patterns in your work life and relationships?
Copyright Gly Solutions, LLC 2014
Reference:
Wakefield, T. H. (2012). An ontology of storytelling systemicity: Management, fractals and the Waldo Canyon fire. (Doctorate of Management Doctoral dissertation), Colorado Technical University, Colorado Springs, CO.
